Someone Like You

Dear Someone Like You,

Of all the things he said and didn't say, the worst was the sentence "I would never marry Someone Like You."

Now you know you are not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but you are a loving, kind, thoughtful, talented, funny person who is deeply committed and willing to put up with a lot.  You love and rescue animals, you take care of all of your millions of friends and your family, you work harder than most people do and it's not for you to have more, it is for the people in your life to have more.

So you sit and ponder that statement, and the only things that come to mind are that you don't cook elaborate meals and you have a messy garage.  I mean, you are well educated, you have money in an annuity and money in a 401K, you own your own beautiful home, you put two kids through college alone.  You are pretty, well loved, flexible, giving...the only parts of you that are not authentic are the parts he created with his expectations.  You were to be a party girl, always be available, willing to listen to him talk about his ex wife every day, show up when and where you were told to, never disagree with him or have an opinion.  You were to take what was given and never ask for more, allow him to brood and give you the silent treatment without comment, never have an emotion other than happiness.  You were the Someone who spent the last month of this relationship crying every day and at odd times because you knew in your heart he was through with you and you didn't have any power left to leave.  You did what was expected of you, you were the Someone who waited tensely for him to end it.  Which he did.

Maybe he meant to say, "I will never marry Someone Who Is Not Exactly Like My Ex Wife"...because he has never processed the fact that she left him abruptly for greener pastures in the hills of North Carolina.  And to that point the Someone Like Him and the Someone Like You could never be happy together because the ex-wife is an unattractive, greedy, manipulative, sneaky, self-centered witch.  And you don't want to ever be Someone Like That.